For years now, I’ve spent my time trying to push myself to go beyond my comfort zone. I’ve done things that I never thought I would. Things I was truly terrified of doing. But the truth is, somehow it still fell within my comfort zone.
I thought there was a standard to things that would be outside of my comfort zone. Self-employment, quitting a job without a plan, snorkeling, getting married out of the country – they seemed risky enough to be considered a little outside of the box. But for me? They weren’t. They defined who I was and what I was about.
I was born to try new things. And live life. Experiencing so many things that it has to offer without being held back by fear. So when it came to know what was in or out of my comfort zone, I had no clue because the world truly did feel like it was at my fingertips.
But over time I realized that I had to decide what was beyond my comfort zone. It wasn’t something predetermined. It wasn’t a hand I was already dealt. It was my choice.
So I had to ask myself a lot of questions. What is beyond my comfort zone? What makes me nervous? What seems harder than the rest of my life and the things I’ve experienced? What truly embraces the thought that anything in life worth having is worth working for?
And I figured out the answers.
Big and little things like moving to Florida. I want to and I know I will, but it’s scary for me to uproot from everything I’ve come to know. And scuba diving. I’m terrified of drowning, but I love the ocean. And failing as an entrepreneur. Self-employment has consumed me and I don’t ever want that to change. And making new friends. Because my past history with friendships kind of sucks. And getting rid of the possessions I own, yet no longer need. Emotional attachments to a life I no longer live are tough to get rid of. And posting fashion posts on the blog. Well, even posting regular pictures of me on the blog. Probably just because I’m weird. And being healthy/fit for once. Which is beyond me as to why.
But all of these things mean something to me. Big or small, they play a part in my life. The life I want to have. And I’m left with feelings of jealousy when I see others doing them because I’ve yet to find that clear path out of my comfort zone to do the exact same thing.
It’s time I take a path though. Any path. Because doing nothing is leaving me feeling like there is a void in my life. Like I’m missing out on something. And I’d much rather make thousands of mistakes trying to find my path out of my comfort zone than miss out on the things I already have just waiting for me to get to them.