Archives for March 8, 2013

A Serious Case of Word Vomit

Sometimes I just don’t like compiling a well-thought out post that has a solid theme, a correlating start and finish, and a moral to a story. So today I thought – why not throw caution to the wind today and just right a bunch of random crap that’s been on my mind lately? And while I’m doing that, why not overshare and go straight for TMI?

And that’s precisely what this post is.

My last period was about a week late and I thought more about motherhood in that one week than I have my entire life. The weirdest thing about that whole week was while I was stressed, there was a sense of calm about it and I’m pretty sure it knocked at least a year off my “I’m not ready for kids” mentality.

My biggest fear is drowning. My second biggest fear? Sharks. Both the real ones in the ocean and those that tear apart dreams in Shark Tank. I would absolutely LOVE to go on the show some day with The Gnarly Whale, but I’m terrified that I would be the one to cry either out of happiness or frustration.

Remember that finger that was swollen for no reason? It’s returned. And brought two friends along for the party: my ring finger and pinky. I’ve googled just about every possible explanation for it and it’s just left me convinced I need to learn to be left-handed because my right hand may no longer function one day.

One of the reasons I don’t get dressed up every day is because I don’t shave my legs often enough. I already know that’s a terrible reason and am only half sure that I will change it now that I know the reason.

Working from home isn’t everything I was hoping for. Sometimes it’s lonely. And sometimes the whole “mind over matter” mantra feels like complete BS. And sometimes I just wish I could head out to an office, gossip with people that I only see at work, and enjoy food days again. But at the end of the day, I’m still grateful for where I am.

I feel like my life is on hold until we move. And it’s starting to weigh on me. There’s so much more for me, for our family, and for the business that’s just waiting for us to cross the borders. Until then, I feel like there’s a part of me that’s sitting on the sidelines, frustrated whenever there isn’t any progression towards that goal.

We’ve re-watched the first season of Dexter for what seems to be the 10th time now. I’ve never seen past this season and am SO determined to make it to season 2 now.

I changed my diet recently and I feel better in the past month than I have in the past ten years. I’m excited to share what it is, but I’m also nervous because it’s such a BIG change for me (and Nathan.) I have the post half-written, but I’m waiting for the right words to finish it.

Now that you’re a little too aware of what’s truly going on in my life lately, what’s going on with you?